Thursday, December 22, 2005

The best thing for Blogs EVER !

Click Play on the player to see the clip



I think (and correct me if im wrong) but i have found the best thing for my blog ever - You see theres a Viral store website called IFilm and they allow you to snag their player and all the Virals to play in the player for free - JUST CLICK THE MENU BUTTON - on the player and check all the options out!

A full 10/10 for that - and the only downside is that it might show you an advert or two for the privelage - big furking deal.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Dont you just love the B3TA

Respect to eclechtech with this top top frontpage effort on B3TA - has to be one of the best comic genius gifs ever to grace my PC - endlessly funny and just bootiful ! Woooo - also the great and wonderful elechtech has devised a Festive Messenger for all ya mates here.

Absolutely brill remake of that tway James Blunts shitty song Your Beautiful (or Gullible!) here as well. Seriuosly good - i sat and watched it with my boss whos from NZ and he wet himself - literally!

What about Haggis hurl - not very festive but some great noises!

Anyway again i tip my hat off to Eclectech and suggest u get that fat ass over there for some fun . . . Woooooo

Good lord

This is some lucky blokes girlfriend called ***** - and he has an account on FlickR - ages ago he came to my attention for a picture of a car (or something) - then the next one was a normal piccy of this fine honey - And today, because im bored like a just recently fed shark, (wtf?) i delved a little deeper into his piccys.

First thing i noticed was the lack of comments - so im guessing not many people get to see his stuff. And then i noticed he was making a card to send out to his friends - incorporating said girl. And here it is. . . Well there are 2 now - but you get the idea.

Forgive me lord for my sins - but i promise to make myself rich next year so i can afford a girl this good. Its about time Lord - Amen - o and Lord can you bring me the strength to give up them damned cigarettes a\nd booze please. Ta mate respect.

Not to sound like a scrooge - but . .

Just decided im not sure that i like xmas at all. My family are all away apart from my Dad - so i'll be home from Boxing Day onwards until i go back to work. Great.

What are you doing over Christmas - and before you tell me - i wish you a very merry one :)

Traffic cones make great flamethrowers.

I don't have any disasterous fire stories, just a bit of firey pyromaniac fun! After sawing off the top of a traffic cone, we sprayed copious amounts of deodorant and hairspray into the interior, and proceeded to light the thing.

The result was...interesting.

(Thanks to Meagle for the story)

Friday, December 16, 2005

Catch up on stuff this week and on teh weekend

Loads to fill you lot in with - All week ive been thinking about the boozing in teh week issue - Ive decided since im looking to get snaffled up next year its time to grow teh fuck up and become a reall 'man' - yep its time to pack in the Xbox and take up teh gym - Stop going for 5 beers after work and go home and cook a nice meal for myself - and generally get more in tune with my career and carve out that niche that ive been threatening to do for some time. First things first though - i have to get over this weekend first.

Saturday night is company Xmas do night - there will be absolutely loads of us there - and when i say there, i mean Addington Palace. Its bloody nice there apparently - ive not been before but ive heard it lully - Its where they hold the 'Posh' dos occasionally - and ive seen the pictures and im impressed - Soooo - will or will i not get some action? I know who im up for - and frankly i think i have a chance of a sly fiddle - but will i get it or not ? hmmmm

So onto next week - JO is off to Andora somewhere on a snowboarding holiday the lucky fuck and so i have to cover his shit - I need to sort out a few install problems over the New Year in advance and obviously get my own GM calendar up to scratch and get my Yearly plan sorted so i can get ahead of this drive to be an adult that i have !

Other then that its the usual shit - chasing CB for the rest of this months rent ! why do i get such bad luck with flatmates huh ! - Its 16 days late and he owes me 275 quid - if i dont get it by the end of the weekend i feel i'll have to chuck his sorry ass out - i have no recourse really do i ? especially since hes a lazy son-of-a-bitch who has issues and no ability - and he hasnt ever given me a deposit. Shit what do i do?

Oh my God !!

One of the gayest telephone answer messages ever heard !! If your from the UK and would like the number to call it and listen - please leave a comment and fill in the email addy so i can send you the last 3 digits ! fuc**ing hell !

ok so its ~ RING 07795 458***

O by the way dont worry its some blokes mobile phone - not a dialler number or scam thing - it came to me as its one of my buddy's mates number and he needs taking the piss out of !

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Il Ponte and beyond

Tonight Samsung are taking us for a lully meal and a drinki and then home - Woo to that - Im taking me camera so those who know how to click the flickr logo thats somewhere on my blog can check out da fotos like. Wicked.

Small edit - - - Drinki was last night now - and here are da fotos - and im shocked and horrified at the mess we were all in! no really it was quite messy - but a real good laff!

Up to date stats for this shitty blog

So here we go have a look at these - the last few months or so - Not bad for a meesly blog - I mean 130 approx hits a day aint bad - Most of them come from BE - but i suppose a lot of those come from misc search terms - i added some riske' page URL's and thats what tends to get me the random hits. But overall im pleased with the results so far.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind !

What a cool bloody fim - i loved it - A bit 'Being John Malkovich' butr all the same a great film that reminds you that although memories can hurt and you wish they'd go away - on the most part you'd be worse off for not having them! Jim Carey and Kate Winslett give brilliantly holding performances that grab your attention and hold it tight - Kate being a fave of mine - i think shes lully - even in this film where she has blue hair and then red hair she looks great - Jim is seriuos 99 percent of the time - and he pulls it off briliantly.

A great film that is a little spooky in places but ends up happy and i loved it - 9/10 from me - Go and get it out !

Monday, December 12, 2005

The wrong sort of fire

How typically 'english' - dont know if anyone outside of the UK have seen this - But a petrol storage facility (3 million gallons) decided to ignite and blow the shit out of most of the surrounding area quite near Hemel Hemstead - Shame really coz Hemel could do with a face lift - like a complete makeover - start from ground zero i say - However yesterday, whilst coooking (see last post) i went out for a cancer-stick and looked up at the sky and saw a smoky haze - Now Buncefield is exactly 59.1 miles away (see here) and i could see the smoke covering the blue sky in a transparent type vail.

So anyway the news was that 'its the wrong sort of fire' - dont have enough 'Affff' (the aqueous repelant they need) - Now im just thinking aloud here - but if you had 7 or 8 storage contatiners of 3 million gallons or so each nearby - you'd have thought that you may have a few tricks up your sleeve to put that shit out - bearing in mind that its also a good terror site! - OOOO no - no tell you what - 'We will let the blaze burn itself out' yea thats what we'll do - burn itself out and then try and extinguish it. Hell what else would you do huh ?

My Mum who lives very near to me as well - Actually heard the explosion - AlJazera.net claims that someone heard it in the Netherlands - Yea righto you just made that up - like everything else.

So anyway - my point is - Was it a terrorist attack? Im sure AlJazera would like us to worry that it is - and if it was an attack will the government own up to it? Do we care ? Do you care?

Jamie Oliver . . move the hell over !

Ooo yes - My mums 60th birthday on Sunday, and i, Ruthlessjack, do declare, that i am a badbwoy chef. Roast Duck with Cherry compote and new potatoes was spot on man - yep - Even if i say it myself - Bloody outstanding i said - Thankfully nobody died whilst eating the wonderfully cooked duck breasta, and nobody choked on my excellently bolied new potatoes either. Loads of cherrys were murdered during the preparation and 2 red onions were taught a good lesson too.

So that aside - i also declare myself - 'Scrabble' king - i won by 40 points on the first game and lost by 1 point the second - down to a rogue 'X' in my tray that i could not rid of. My Mums got a pet Fox by the way - and a Magpie that likes to play with the fox - o and a cat that watches both of them eat on the lawn - Dont beleive me ? click here!

Apart from that - i got in at about 10pm and opened a lovely can of beer - and another and then listened to New Order on my headphones until my brain hurt. Which was fun. How was your weekend ?

Monday, December 05, 2005

Things you can only say during Christmas

1. I prefer breasts to legs
2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
3. Smother the butter all over the breasts!
4. If I don't undo my trousers, I'll burst!
5. I've never seen a better spread!
6. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.
7. Are you ready for seconds yet?
8. It's a little dry; do you still want to eat it?
9. Just wait your turn, you'll get some!
10. Don't play with your meat.
11. Stuff it up between the legs as far as it will go.
12. Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?
13. I didn't expect everyone to come at the same time!
14. You still have a little bit on your chin.
15. How long will it take after you put it in?
16. You'll know it's ready when it pops up.
17. Just pull the end and wait for the bang.
18. That's the biggest bird I've ever had!
19. I'm so full, I've been gobbling nuts all morning.
20.Wow, I didn't think I could handle all that and still want more!
21. I do like a good stuffing.