Monday, January 10, 2005

A great British fresh start

There was me thinking i could handle it ... Nope not by a mile - I eventually lost my cool Saturday evening . The thought of her sitting at home doing "whatever" and me twiddling my thumbs - wanting to be there - feeling lonely gave way to anger - Still cant justify her reasons - so i decided to self-implode - Im used to that - Its no secret that i cant deal with rejection . In fact rejection is my worst fear . and to be rejected by SS just before xmas the way i was isnt ever going to get any better - Staring at her on Thursday made me realise that i cant be this girls friend - Impossible

How could i trust her in anyway ? i mean i dont beleive there isnt someone else - Rob perhaps - Hes just been released from a long term relationship - and it was clear from when i first met him in The Treehouse that they have a "special" relationship - OH whatever - i dont care anymore.

Getting SS to say "we will never be together ever again " on saturdaynight kinda iced the cake didnt it matey..... Spent the rest of the weekend wondering why i did that ... But it makes sense - No more pain - No more wondering and certainly it will help me to move on and get on with my life - If you read this SS i am sorry - i just cant be your pal as much as i wanted to - I wish you well .... maybe in a few months we can catch up.

I will be cabbing her stuff back to CP - no more ties

Zbogom -Jaz Zeleti vi no!

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